Friday, July 25, 2008

The death of a horse keeper

Yet another significant event has caused me to reevaluate life as I know it. Early this afternoon, my sister Emily texted me at work informing me that my Grandpa Beu died this morning. I was in shock of course and she didn't have much more information to give me. The last time someone close to me died was my Grandma Gordon, but I was only 16. Then, I don't think I had too much of a grasp on the concept of death.

Sunday, we had a lesson on mourning the death of a loved one from the Joseph Smith manual. How appropriate for my family at this time. I wasn't very close with my grandfather. The last time I saw him was in a visit our family made to Washington last summer for my cousin's wedding. He and my dad were so alike, I noticed. They had the same mannerisims in how they interacted with others. They were both very loveable. But of course the major differences stood out, mainly the absence of religion in my grandparents life was the biggest chasm of all.

As I analyze my grief and sadness, I feel a rather close connection if I imagine my grandfather on the other side of the veil, going through a "checking in" of sorts.

"John Franklin Beu," he'd say.

"Hmm..." the angel at check-in would scan his list. "Yup, here you are. Died this morning? Well, welcome to the world of Spirits."

I also imagine somewhat of a welcoming committe made up of his mother and father and other relatives. Maybe even his ex-wife. Who knows. I imagine him learning all sorts of things about Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ by other spirits who know. I imagine him wanting to accept what he's being taught, but not being able to do much about it.

I see a family trip to the temple to do his work for him, whether we know or not that he's accepted the restored gospel of Jesus Christ.

This is very much skewed and inaccurate, but it strangely consoles me to imagine what it's like up there from what I've studyied about the Spirit World.

Other thoughts have gone through my mind, such as how important family relationships are. I myself am not very good at keeping in contact with my extended family. I never have been and neither has my mother or father. I want to change that, as I learned in a class at school, these relationships are perpetuated beyond the grave. I am also held accountable for the relationships I have and what I do with, I believe.

After today, I plan on getting in contact with aunts and uncles with whom I have talked for a long time. I plan on calling my grandmother more often, as well as my mother's father, with whom it's difficult to talk. These plans should have been priority from the beginning. But it's never too late.